The fifth element of emotional intelligence that I’m going to talk about this week is assertiveness. Assertiveness is by far my lowest score of the 16 elements of the EQi 2.0, and not an area that comes naturally to me. Assertiveness is the defined by the EQi 2.0 as “your ability to put your needs, thoughts and opinions out into the world – even when doing so invites opposition or conflict or causes you to take a stand.” Firmness, strength, argumentation & debate are all rooted in assertiveness.
Assertiveness can be incredibly necessary in the coronavirus situation we are all experiencing throughout the world. We all have thoughts about everything going on right now and it’s important to stick up for your opinions and what you believe in. Too little assertiveness tends to yield feedback that you are withholding, uncommitted to your point/position, easy to convince, and possibly can be taken advantage of. Everyone is entitled to their own thoughts and opinions, and it takes utilizing our assertiveness muscle to show this.
With that being said, I wanted to share three specific ways we can work on our assertiveness:
- Take a specific position or express a certain idea and stick to it even if you don’t think it’s going to be harmoniously received.
- Practice saying “no,” to something that you are not interested or able to do.
- Actively plan to approach someone with whom you disagree on something with, and discuss that disagreement. You can do so non-confrontationally, but clearly state your opposition.